A porcelain prison (day one)

I wanted to try something a little different… I will respond to comments in character, feel free to ask questions or suggest things to either Dr. Black or his assistant. You never know, it might influence the next installment.

These are the scientific notes of Dr. Jacob Black, dictated to his assistant Natasha Rubina due to Dr. Black’s current status.

Day one.
I will start by saying the obvious, experiment 5726 was a complete failure. Somehow the containment field collapsed and I was directly affected. The unfortunate effect being my present state trapped in the form of an inanimate object, to make the situation even more embarrassing the object I have ended up as is a toilet. Luckily I have retained the power of speech and still have my full range of senses, although my sight is centered from the bottom of the bowl so I can only see my own rim and the ceiling of the laboratory unless someone looks directly into me. Over the course of the last few hours my assistant Natasha has taken samples from various parts of my form to test the composition of the materials I am now made of. It turns out my bowl is porcelain, my seat, cistern and pipes are standard plastics and all my fittings are metal. Doing the surface tests she found no organic matter at all, which makes me wonder how I am still alive. As if to make things even more uncomfortable each part of my new form still feels like a part of my old body. The worst ones being that the inside of the bowl feels like my mouth and can even taste, the flush handle feels like my penis and when Natasha touched it I must admit it sent a shiver through my form and my cistern feels like my testicles although they feel strangely empty, likely because the cistern should be full of water.

At first I thought that this was the end for me, but the more I think about it the more positive I am becoming. I am stuck as a toilet, but I still have my mind and surly a toilet is only a toilet if it is plumbed in and used to get rid of human waste. Right now I am a man who is paralysed and happens to be made of inorganic materials, i’m sure I can find a way to carry on with my life. Any questions you may have for me can be written in the comments and Natasha can read them out to me and write my responses.

Natasha’s notes.
I cannot believe that the Dr. has ended up as a lavatory… It is so weird to hear his voice coming from a toilet sitting in the middle of the laboratory. What makes it worse is that it is all my fault, I forgot to turn the containment field on. Now the Dr. has this crazy idea that he can carry on with his life and be the next Stephen Hawkins, but I don’t think that the world is ready for a talking toilet.  Surely if the rest of the scientific community finds out they will experiment on him to try and figure out how he is still alive… I think that maybe I should try to hide him somewhere for his own protection…


Filed under Accident, Permanent, Story, Toilet

5 responses to “A porcelain prison (day one)

  1. seahawksmd

    At an initial and very private question and answer sessions with the doctor……

    Dr. Black, I wonder if you have any thoughts on other applications for the failed containment field, if you could somehow learn to direct and control it. For example, you wound up in the form of a toilet, but might it be able to alter the field to transform you into another form, or perhaps direct what a person is converted into?

    (speaking outside the realm of the story, friggin awesome concept, love it)

    • Dr. Black – I do not want to bore you too much with the scientific data of why when the containment field collapsed that the machine chose to convert my mass into this form. I am sure that if programmed correctly a human being could be converted into virtually any inorganic compounds in almost any shape or size. Can it convert my mass as it presently is? That is unfortunately an unknown variable, it could change me into something much less embarrassing or it could kill me by removing what little humanity remains. I hope that answers your questions.

      (thank you for the encouragement! )

  2. This is utterly fantastic Dr. Black! I have a few questions about your condition, sorry if I list a few too many but you must understand it’s not every day you get to talk with a toilet!

    You say you aren’t connected to the plumbing, so do you feel dehydrated or in some way unfilled/unfulfilled without water in you like a normal toilet would? And if there’s no water in you, and your mouth is essentially the bowl, do you have a very dry feeling in your mouth now and does that make you want to be connected to the plumbing? Also, what do you think about the possibility of being used and do you find your new form craving it? And finally what do you fear more. Being considered a freak of nature and being experimented on for the rest of your life to see how you’re still alive, or being forgotten about and used as a mere toilet for the rest of your days?

    Also a question to Natasha. What are you thinking of doing to hide Dr. Black? Take him home and hide him in your house? Or hide him in plain sight in a bathroom?

    • Dr. Black – Hello miss Candi, first of all I am afraid I cannot share your excitement about my situation, fantastic is not a term I would use to describe this turn of events. Now onto your questions.

      Not being plumbed in is making me feel somewhat wrong, with my mouth this dry I feel constantly thirsty and since my cistern is made from my testicles it feels very wrong that it is empty. Perhaps being plumbed in would fix these problems, but there is a chance it could make things worse. What if all the water made it feel like I am drowning? What if my cistern being full made my testicles hurt from the pressure? There is also the problem that there is no water supply coming into the laboratory.

      Thankfully I have no craving for being used as a toilet at this time, the idea of someone defecating into my mouth is frankly quite disgusting and very terrifying.

      I am afraid I cannot really decide between the two unfortunate choices you have offered me, I trust Natasha and I do not think she would let either of those things happen to me. Hopefully that answers your questions.

      Natasha – I do not drive so getting the Dr. to my house would be difficult, not to mention I am sure that someone from security would stop me from taking a toilet out of the building. There is a ladies bathroom on this floor that is being refurbished if anyone starts to look into his disappearance I could hide him there for a little while.

      (thank you for the questions, the next installment will be quite soon.)

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